If you are a parent, then surely, at one point or another, you have had to deal with sibling rivalries. A tale as old as time, sibling rivalry is one of the most human aspects of growing up. However, while some modicum of bickering is to be expected and understood, fighting between brothers and sisters should never reach a point where it impinges on the healthy functioning of the family.
Why Do Siblings Argue And Fight?
A confrontation between brothers and sisters typically stems from a few underlying issues. Siblings fight when they are hungry, cranky, angry, or lacking attention. Anything that makes them uncomfortable can become a trigger. Sometimes they might even fight out of sheer boredom or jealousy.
You can expect sibling rivalries to diminish as children grow older and develop closer bonds with one another. As children grow up, they also learn to understand the rules that govern social and family life and come to appreciate working together to resolve conflict. This is an essential component of social maturity and emotional wellbeing.
However, if the fights in your house are a daily occurrence, there may be a few things you can do to stem the tide.
Here are a few tips you can use to deal with sibling rivalry:
1 - Make it a priority to teach your children to learn essential human values from an early age. Teach your children to be loving, helpful, peaceful, generous, compassionate, and forgiving. When adults don't like each other, they can simply avoid being around one another. However, siblings do not possess that luxury. If they can't be apart from one another, it is paramount that they gain the ability to deal with each other.
2 - Never make comparisons between your children. Avoid comparing them like the plague. Never say phrases like, "your brother is smarter, your sister is prettier, why can't you just be more like so and so." The only thing you will accomplish with these untoward comparisons is to sow the seeds of discord between them.
3 - As much as possible, try to have separate spaces. Even if your house is small, and your children share the same room, they shouldn't have to share everything. Attempt giving each child their own space and their own belongings.
4 - Do not tolerate disrespect. Teach your children that no matter how angry or upset they may be, they should never be disrespectful towards their siblings. Do not tolerate name-calling, or allow one child to give another a hurtful nickname.
5 - This is one of the most essential parenting tips you will ever receive. Teach your children to negotiate. Teach them to talk things out and to remain open to the idea of compromise. Life is a game of give and take; thus, if you teach your kids how to negotiate with one another successfully, you will be preparing them for a plethora of future conflicts.